Lost in the relationship
I feel super lost in the current r/s. I cant feel his love. Deep inside my heart, I keep asking myself whether i should cont this r/s. Even my dad feels that he is just fooling ard with me.How can a person stand not seeing each other for half a mth when they r not even tgt for 2mths.but he can. i m crying every single day that he say lets not chat tonight. He doesnt understd how i feel when i spend so much time waiting for him, even for just a call. Initially call me baby and he suddenly change to dear. this makes me feels like he has another girl who he is calling baby. Every time he decided something, he will just tell me wat he decided w/o asking me my opinion or even explaining to me y he decided this way or that. I m a person with very bad temper. I m enduring so much for him n he take it for-granted. He can say he want to slp ard 11plus so he dont wan chat with me. But watsapp doesnt lie!!!everytime i see his last log in is ard 1 plus near 2am?. everytime i see that i will tink of whether i shld give up this r/s.my life doesnt need some1 that cant appreciate n cherish me. Just becos i say i wish we can meet more often, doesnt mean i have to quit my job for it!!! We can always try to meet up for a dinner or lunch.but he was the 1 say it is stupid to meet for that 1 or 2 hrs. In future, if we really can last(which i tink is kind of impossible), we both have to work, if sat sun need to meet frens or wat, it will be even harder to meet. How could him tink in his way n ask me quit my job. How abt me asking him to quit the job for me? I asked him abt this be4 n he answered me we r diff, he have to pay his sch fees n own expenses. I dont have too. I have my parents giving me allowance, paying my sch fees, hp bills, all my expenses etc...so y i have to work?! how could he say that when i already told him in the 1st place i m a workaholic once i start working. Plus i spend alot!!!I have to earn some extra pocket money for myself instead of asking fr my parents!!!I m so tired to wait wait wait for him. Waiting for him to give in a little, waiting for him to say he miss me, waiting for him to initiate a chat 1st, waiting n waiting.I spend so much time on waiting for him to call n knock off from work. At least an hr! the most 3 hrs!!!Imagine i have been doin that for the past 2 mth plus...each day take the least an hr n multiply with 60 days. 60 hrs is like nearly 3 days?i spend 3days waiting for him!!!these 3days can do so much things le. every hr i give him = i slp lesser. every wk days i only slp like 6hrs! it was prove that ppl in our age still need ard 10 hrs of slp!!!but i m slping 4 hrs lesser. while he usually gets his 8 hrs of slp or even more!!!
Last night when i was on my way home, my brain was also occupied with him.I m always tinking of him when i m free. But i wonder wat he thinks when he is free!!!will i even come across his thoughts?!i need my sense of secure!!!Can u pls give me?!
Wat shld i do???!!!give up on the r/s?I m lost!!!wat shld i do????
posted by Su Eng @ 10:51 am
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